Lavender's Dungeon

(TW: abusive relationships)

Last night I thought about you

the day that you came into my room

struck fear into the eyes of the snake

spewing venom in my face

His eyes throwing daggers

me on the bed

taking every blade

—

You didn’t knock

you opened the door

grabbing the python

’round his scaly neck

Casting him out the window

—

You sat on the bed

“He’ll be back”

—

All my life I was your protector

I chased away your bullies

on the playground

Hiding your secrets

from mom and dad

—

Not once had you come to my rescue

yet here you were

I looked at you now

and saw a man

with a face of our father’s

—

You didn’t have to say anything

I knew

everyone knew

his poison and blades

did too much damage

I was beyond repair

—

Fast forward years later

the antidote worked

although the internal damage remained

you took your destined course

miles away from the pack

—

Running through frozen trees

glistening mountainsides

you found your own poison

Your own addictive toxin

hidden in the body

of a woman

—

Watching from afar

The pattern looks the same

The venom sweet at first

tolerance builds

and one day

you feel your stomach eating away

—

Arguments turn into brawls

Crying turns to screaming

Dreams turn to dust

blowing through the chilled air

of the harsh northern tundras

—

Yet the toxins are addictive

they keep you crawling

back for more

—

Sometimes darkness can feel

like a warm blanket

—

How can you not see?

What keeps you crawling back?

How can you expect me to watch from afar?

—

When all I want to do is wring her slimy neck

cast her out the window

as you did my captor

break your cycle

protect you

like old times

—

But that’s the catch, isn’t it?

the antidote is already within you

the hardest part

is drawing it from the depths of your loins

and only you can be the one

—

Love,

Lavender D.

November 2nd, 2021

(I’m sorry it’s been so long)